Kobs' Visual/Voice & Hollars' Pitches
For BJ's pitches, one thing that sticks out to me is how each pitch ends. The pitch for "When Life Gives You Lemons, Water the Tomatoes" ends with the line "Still, we water, we weed, we try." Ending your pitch with a resonating statement like this makes it feel memorable and powerful. This feature really emphasizes to me that the author has been turning this idea around in their mind, not that they are just thinking of an essay topic as they crank out the pitch. What is a detail that you've noticed that makes pitches feel well-thought-out, powerful, or a detail that conveys that the author is a strong writer?
Looking at Samantha Kobs' Visual/Voice episode with Volume One, I found this to be a really interesting example of what you can do with nonfiction. Gone are the expectations of an essay in print, but we are now approaching the "fringes of nonfiction!" Seeing the author and their mannerisms, hearing their tone of voice, and the way that they tell their story, gives a story new meaning and makes it feel more relatable and fresh. It can also be a lot less intimidating to approach a 3 1/2 minute video over a page full of text if you don't know if you'll be interested. What did you all think of this type of medium used for a personal essay? What other ways can nonfiction writing (or writing of any kind) be approached to make it feel like a new experience? When I took a creative nonfiction course with Stephanie Turner, we had to do a mixed media project with one of our creative nonfiction pieces. I mixed images of old paintings with excerpts of my essay that related to one another. In my writing, I compared myself to a woman from a Jane Austen novel, a "housebound heroine" and used images to relay my feeling of antiquity. There's another that I made with a text about a Zoom call that I put in the Zoom background. I'll try to add them below if you want to have a look; let's hope it works! :)
When reading over some of the pitches from BJ and others from class what stood out to me was some of the questions or funny anecdotes added into the pitch. This made it seem like they were passionate about writing the entire essay rather than just trying to sell the pitch. An example was Charlie's pitch about his spontaneous trip with his friends, the two blondes. It was the energy he placed in his pitch and the writing provided that made me not only love the pitch but excited to read his essay. These are the pitches that people agree to.
ReplyDeleteRelating to the question of other forms of media, I like the podcasts because the writer is also the reading and you get the full view of how it should be read. I've had a lot of times stopped reading something and thought to myself, "how would the author have read this?" Sometimes I feel like readers don't to justice to the piece they are reading. I enjoyed the picture piece that you provided in the initial post because it was a unique way to present your piece and one that I wouldn't have thought about trying. I often feel as though writers tend to stick with what they know they are best and and don't stray to far from that medium.
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ReplyDeleteGreat questions, lead writer! (Sorry, I’m not sure who you are.) I also agree that how the pitch ends is critically important. It’s our last chance to engage the reader, and we want to conclude on a powerful note. In reviewing the pitches from last week, I’ve noticed a common thread in the final sentences – references to time and timelessness. When we write about something that is important to us, we want our message to be timeless and enduring, not something that happened just once and has no broader implications. How better to express this sense of timelessness than by making specific references to past, present, and future?
ReplyDeleteFor instance, Prof. Hollars refers to the “past,” “today,” and the “future” in the two final sentences of his Oregon Trail pitch. Similarly, Sam points to the “past, present, and future,” while Victoria writes of “our past” and “our futures.” Bryson looks to the future with a reference to “the next generation of dads,” and Adam concludes with a nod to questions that have endured “for years.” Likewise, Izzy writes of enjoying ourselves in “this lifetime,” and Jake refers to his grandfather’s “life story.” Sawyer’s reference to “one point or another” also speaks to moments in time, while Nora’s remark about “my daily back-and-forth” refers to an ongoing conversation. Charlie ends his pitch with the term “redneck dynasty,” which, by definition, spans generations. Coincidence? I don’t think so. Concluding a pitch with a reference to the message’s timelessness confers significance on our writing and thus serves as a powerful technique.
I also observed a second common thread and equally powerful technique employed in the final sentences of last week’s pitches – inviting the reader into the conversation and addressing the universality of the message. For example, Avery writes, “Let’s explore the in-betweens,” specifically inviting the reader to join her exploration. Prof. Hollars concludes his pitch about his father-in-law with the sentence “Still, we water, we weed, we try.” This is an expansive “we” that includes the writer, the reader, and all of humanity. Madeline alludes to both time and universality in her final sentences. The “day to day” life of a bartender implies an ongoing experience, and her reference to how “we grow as a society” speaks to a universal experience.
Yes, your multimodal presentation really works for me! Your images lend a sense of timelessness to your text. The past is captured by the old paintings, and what could be more contemporary than a Zoom background? I also like Samantha Kobs’ “Visual Voice,” which conveys more information than words on a page. For example, her enthusiasm and sense of humor, which are very evident in the presentation, would be less vivid in a written transcript. That said, I was occasionally distracted by the background. Is this Samantha’s home? I strained to read the titles of the books on the shelves. Are the framed certificates hers? What are they for? Perhaps a less “busy” background would be preferable.
Scott, I really love your analysis of our collected pitches--I hadn't noticed this myself, so I'm glad you pointed it out! Perhaps without realizing it, each of us included elements of time " in our pitches to make them more relevant and, perhaps paradoxically, "timeless!"
DeleteHi Elise! I love your "Housebound Heroine" mixed-media project! It makes a great case for finding 'new' ways to present nonfiction and other prose (or writing in general). I think Samantha Kobs’ video essay was the “lite” version of redefining form, and perhaps a good place for novices (like me) to start revamping pen-and-paper pieces. That said, I wonder—at what point does a new medium become a cover or an excuse for less interesting substance? That is, at what point is a book only its cover? How might using our voice or our facial expressions relieve us of the pressure of conveying emotion and tone through our words themselves?
ReplyDeleteThis is something I think about a lot as an artist and a writer. Some teachers and professors encourage you to think outside the box, while others seem to see this as “cheating” or taking the “easy” way out. I suppose I take the approach of “learn the rules, then break them,” so that your departures from the expected are meaningful rather than incidental. For example, Elise, your “Housebound Heroine” uses a meaningful combination of modern situations (such as the difficulties of lockdown) and historical/classic images and texts. You draw connections between your own life and a famous class of literature in a way that allows your reader (audience?) to dig into the comparisons rather than struggle to comprehend them. Your use of multiple mediums helps capture this connection and add additional layers of meaning. Meanwhile, Samantha Kobs’ video essay doesn’t exactly seem like it “needed” to be told with audio-visual supplements—what about it made pen and paper unfit to present it? And even if a simple written essay couldn’t do the trick, why not make it a podcast episode, and capture the vocal variation and her points of emphasis? Kobs didn’t seem to do anything in the video besides present the essay; the only argument I can think of in favor of “needing” the video component is that the coziness of the background could draw us in as listeners and make us feel more at home with Kobs, a stranger, as she told her story. But even then, I’m not convinced.
Hey Elise!
ReplyDeleteI find that the most resonant thing to find in each pitch is a mission statement, or some direct theme the essay promises to explore with a sense of flair and drama. It projects confidence in BJ's writing and leaves the audience wanting more. Being able to get at the heart of what your writing is a crucial skill that separates aimless freewriting from a polished, air-tight essay. Even through its refinement you can still hear his genuine voice reflected all throughout his writing.
I absolutely ADORE oral storytelling and thought this was a really creative writing approach for a news outlet like Volume One. I think it's a more personal approach to sharing your own stories and has a stronger potential for relatability. I thought the medium felt really refreshing, but had a core issue. Samantha's verbiage and delivery felt more like she was reading off the page instead of talking to the audience. I really enjoyed her story but thought it was missing something. Experimenting with different writing mediums is a great thing but I think your style has to adapt to whatever format you're using.
As far as different methods, I think podcasting is a swell way to share your writing! It allows you to have your voice reflected in your writing and pace your storytelling in your natural cadence. Not only that, but you oftentimes have a person to talk to so that can react to what your saying and give insights and observations. It all culminates in a more personal experience that makes the audience feel like they're hanging out with the speakers--is there a better way to feel connected with an author than that?
For me, the biggest detail I’ve noticed in a well thought out pitch has been that image or idea that contains reverberating implications. For instance, after reading BJ’s “When Life Gives You Lemons, Water the Tomatoes”, I found myself walking around my apartment, drifting towards my open window, and mumbling something to the effect, “Still we water, we weed, we try.” What does it mean to try? We try every day when we get up. We try when we brush our teeth. We try to get our blog posts done on time. In the face of all this adversity we try. Now, here I am standing in front of my window, in the throes of some existential realization about what beautiful means and it’s because of that reverberating message. Yes, both the pitch and essay were excellent (brownie points please?) but what’s really something is that moment where experience ends, and we’re all left feeling raw emotion.
ReplyDeleteComing into the second question, I loved the way in which Kob presented her personal essay. I’m a huge fan of Audible and I’ve found myself wondering more than once if some of these books would be as good without the voice actor’s killer narrations. For example, I listened to The Things They Carried by Tim O’ Brien which was narrated by Bryan Cranston, and I definitely cried more than once. It was a masterful production. Now the book is as good in my opinion, but there’s something to be said about the power of hearing. Why do we like music? Over the summer I read a poem by Allen Ginsburg calls Kaddish which was an out of this world powerful account of life with his mentally ill mother. In the spirit of “blurring the lines” I think the argument could be made that the poem is as much unique essay. Bringing this back around to Kob’s piece, I love the idea of being heard when one writes. There’s an extra element there (hearing, duh Rob) that can really lend itself to a more visceral experience for the listener.
Brownie points noted! JK!!
DeleteElise, great post! You make some great points and I have to agree. One of the details that I’ve noticed reading BJ’s writing is the concrete details that he includes hold meaning and are important for us later on in the pitch. We know this is well-thought out because he took the time to include these important details to get his point across and make his work memorable and powerful. I will remember it because he made a point to include and weave it into the story to put more meaning into the story and leaving us with a lesson or idea of importance that will resonate with us as readers (and writers) and as writers, we want the meaning or impact of our stories to stick with our readers, so it’s important for a strong writer to have the ability to do this.
ReplyDeleteFor the video essay and this medium for a personal essay, I think it works really well and it can be easier to share your stories over the internet this way then just on pages (wider network of people). A lot of people learn better visually as well and I think it’s a very unique way to tell your story as well as see how the writer tells the story (tone, etc) which cannot be conveyed on paper. There are a lot of great ways to share art (writing or otherwise, together or separate) now especially with the internet and it’s so cool to see the ways people can explore and make something cool and new by combining different forms of art to make something unique and incredibly interesting, like you did Elise with your essay and old paintings, what a cool way to mix your media and make something new! I like the idea of the video essays like Kob did, you can get the story directly from the author and unlike a podcast, you can watch the writer instead of just listening on a podcast. I think it’s cool when we’re able to mix old and new to make something entirely and using music to bring in meaning is a cool concepts as well.
For me, a lot of the strong pitches we have seen really have that catch to them. Whether that be through the lines they have, the comments, or the opening and closing statements. A good pitch to me has something in it that leaves the reader remembering, wanting more, or resonating with the author. I think so many authors are chasing that within both themselves and their audience. We all want that something more, and sometime we nail it right on the head and sometimes we fall flat on our faces, and that is simply the process of writing, no matter how crappy that is.
ReplyDeleteI think BJ's pieces really showed how a solid pitch can get you excited for an essay. His pitches set us up for the essay really well, and I knew what to expect but was still really happy with the results, and I think that is a huge thing. Readers knowing what to expect but still having that connection to the piece shows that a writer has so many options in how they choose to go about their work, and not matter what thing works best for them, there are ways to set the pace and still have a great piece of work to show.
For Kobs piece, I was not entirely sure how to feel about it. I loved the content of what she was saying, but it felt so much like a written essay that I was conflicted. It felt monotoned to me, like she was just reading off a piece of paper instead of having that conversation. That may stem from a lot of video media being less formal, so hearing someone speak an essay can be a bit strange. It felt like I should be reading the piece instead of listening to it. Because of this, I was not entirely convinced this medium is for me, but I certainly get the appeal for it. I think I may have also had an expectation on what I was expecting from the video. I was expecting more emotion or more flair to it since it is spoken, but since it is technically an essay, I did not get exactly what I was expecting. I am a huge fan of podcasts, so I maybe was expecting something more along those lines, so that may have thrown me off too. I overall think different types of medias work for different people, and some people prefer spoken essays to written, as a lot of it may be easier and more entertaining to get through. There are so many different mediums out there these days, so it is really cool to have people be allowed to find where they work and learn best. I think being able to do that helps so many people develop into better writers and better readers, and that to me is a really cool thing.
I think the best pitches we have seen are ones that don't necessarily feel like they are pitching something. The best pitches seem to be a well done synopsis of what the article is about. To echo the discussion leaders point, good pitches often have a stellar ending. Something dramatic, or thought provoking to leave the reader wanting more, and this is what makes the pitch effective. In today's day and age, there is so much information to intake, creative or otherwise. Short, detailed, and action packed pitches seem to be the most effective in gaining readers attention and intrigue long enough for them to give your story a chance.
ReplyDeleteLooking at Volume One’s Visual Voice series, I’m intrigued. I love mixing modes of expression as a way to share creatively. Reading an essay is great, but being able to hear the author read it themselves, with the tone in their voice that they imagined for the story, you can’t get more authentic than that. I’m currently student teaching in an 8th grade classroom and my CT frequently writes for Volume One. Every year he shares a choose your own adventure book with the kids that he himself wrote as an eighth grader. He wrote a story for Volume One, that was turned into a Visual Voice episode, explaining how he shares this every year, what it is, and the main objective of it. This year, rather than explain what the book is, he showed the kids the video of him reciting this essay, and it was incredibly effective. Students get read at all day, but changing the mode of communication allowed them to get even more excited about what we were going to be doing. I think with how our culture is changing with technology, our modes of creative expression are bound to change along with it.
These are super great questions i'm excited to dive in.
ReplyDeleteFirst, I think that pitches that contain unique qualities are the most memorable to me. Whether that be a unique concept, unique form or medium, or use possible quotations to be used in the essay being pitched, they are all good qualities to have in a pitch. Where I know that a pitch is a very loose idea, the title also carries importance for me, even though it can still be editied for the final essay. It to me is just as much of a hook as the first line of any type of literature. It's what makes you want to read that story, that poem, that essay and I think it's an important aspect to hold in importance.
Second, I like the idea of having a different medium to portray a essay or an idea. I think it's creativity can at times even express the message better than words can, similar to how writing things in certain forms can accomplish the same thing. People do this every day sometimes without even realizing. When thinking of how people share their nonfiction, their personal stories, tik tok had become a huge platform for that and accomplishes it with visual and audio rather than text (though it is sometimes present). I just feel that in this age of digital, social media, communication at our finger tips, there is something a bit more meaningful in written text and I enjoy the classic feel of that medium and the power of just how much a writer can convery by just using their words.
This post, first of all, posited some great questions, and made me recall many of our pitches (much like the examples Scott gave) and the details that were similar or noteworthy within them. As far as an important or powerful aspect of a pitch, I find myself searching for some sort of greater understanding or lasting knowledge that is imparted on me as a reader, upon the conclusion of the pitch. The understanding could be as broad and encompassing as BJ's "still we water, we weed, we try." yet it could be incredibly personal as well. I think this juxtaposition or dichotomy of the personal and the universal shines through in BJ's pitch "When Life Gives You Lemons, Water the Tomatoes." The pitch shows, even its limited form, the expansion from the personal experience in tragedy, to a larger more universal worldview of how humans get on after a tragedy, and the best part is that it helps the reader see and feel the connection on both levels, without diminishing one or the other. I've always been fascinated with the personal vs. the universal in terms of human experience, and have tried to capture it in my writing at times. I would say without a doubt that BJ captures it in both his pitches, and that the ability to do so is the sign of an accomplished and thoughtful writer.
ReplyDeleteAs for Kobs' multimedia essay, I found myself torn. As much as a multimedia piece can be interesting or refreshing in the seemingly endless sea of mediocre or similar writing, I think the multimedia format can hinder the writer and the reader, if not employed properly (this, however, is easier said than done). I also want to take a moment to say that I agree with a lot of what Victoria said in her comment about the piece. I, too, agree that the spoken word or video part felt strange. It seemed to shatter the immersive nature of the narrative, but maybe that was just me. I believe that the reason behind the strangeness, for me at least, is because of the difference in reading a piece to yourself, versus hearing it read out loud by someone else, or even by yourself. While reading pieces out loud can clue the writer in to clunky-sounding sentence structure when editing, or emphasize a certain emotion (i.e spoken word poetry), I think a writer reading their own piece (particularly non-fiction) to an audience, especially in a video format and not a live setting, takes the reins of interpretation away from the reader or audience. We no longer read the piece to ourselves in our head and thus are less prone to go back and reread, or re-watch, rather, a portion of the video that was thought-provoking. Videos as media are more static in the way they are consumed, there is one party who is actively broadcasting communication (my communications minor is finally being put to use here), and one party who is receiving. Reading something offers more opportunities to formulate opinions and ideas while actively reading. The author isn't speaking at you, but is instead offering up something for you to understand, interpret, and go back to at your leisure. I think I will have to look at or find more examples of multimedia pieces to perhaps broaden my understanding or critique of such a medium, who knows, maybe I will change my opinion as time goes on.
I think for me, what makes pitches feel well thought-out, powerful, etc is the idea's uniqueness, and it ties into your other question of how you can approach writing to make it feel like a new type of experience. I think it’s really easy to want to stay in conventional boxes when it comes to writing because it’s easy and you’re getting your point across, but unconventional writing, going beyond the binary is what stems from all great writing’s.
ReplyDeleteSo one thing I took away from the pitches that I think categorizes them as strong pitches is again uniqueness and addressing the story not in a way that you would typically think to address a story, but dancing around all the good, juicy parts, the emotional parts, the relationship dynamics, the plot, etc. And then having a well- rounded platform to fit in all that you want to talk about from the pitches into 300-500 words. For instance in B.J’s “What My Son and I Learned on The Oregon Trail”, he fits in all the compelling parts of the piece into one little sentence that really grabs the reader's attention, “we encountered the usual setbacks (from car trouble, to inclement weather, to father-son fatigue, thought the most compelling drama involved people, privilege, and our attempt to find common ground among strangers”. What a sentence, and I think this is a perfect example of what makes a strong writer because he used all the dynamics of the story and fit it into only one sentence that really shows the readers what this essay is going to be about, without revealing too much.
To answer the last questions, I enjoyed the reading out-loud, video essay to convey her story. It was a great way to explore how Kob’s would want the readers to read her essay, and by giving us the different facial expressions and stops and pauses at all the right times it adds to the dimension of the story a bit, and it’s more compelling that way. I think writing can be approached in so many different ways that make it compelling, for instance I’ve tried using poetry in my essay writing to bring another level of storytelling. I think poetry is a great way to tell stories or lay out a scene when you want to describe the scene in detail, or to feel the emotion from the moment.
I like your Jane Austen example because at one point I was at an art gallery and I was captivated by this painting, so I went home that night and wrote about it. I wrote about the lady in the painting and her expression on her face- I wrote about this made up story all from one painting. So I believe there are so many ways in which we can find inspiration and creativity when it comes to expressing a story which is the beauty of writing.
I think what makes a great pitch is not only the idea behind the piece, but how it is presented. This might be a yeah-no-duh point, but this isn’t as easy as it seems. You could have an essay about seeing a turtle in your backyard and while that’s not the most interesting plot, if a writer presents this idea in an engaging way and with a good message behind it, then I think anyone would be interested in reading it. I think BJ’s pitches do a great job of this (I’m not saying your ideas were boring btw). But in the case of “When Life Gives You Lemons, Water the Tomatoes”, the main idea which is growing tomatoes, isn’t necessarily what people would think of a deep and interesting story. But with the lesson and emotion that BJ describes, I think we can all agree it is a deep and emotional story we enjoyed. As for spoken word formatting, I think there is a reason why it is becoming more popular by the second. Nonfiction is an amazing way to connect with the author, but that connection runs even deeper when you can hear the words coming out of their mouths, with their attitude, their voice, and their enthusiasm.
ReplyDeleteExploring the first question: What is a detail that you've noticed that makes pitches feel well-thought-out, powerful, or a detail that conveys that the author is a strong writer? I think it's important to consider not just an individual moment of reflection mentioned in the piece, but the act of reflection itself. I think there are all sorts of profound moments that happen around us, whether it be with strangers or family members, that are deeply meaningful, but often go overlooked because we don't take the time to consider what the mean to us or the world on a deeper level. Amongst all the grief in the moment, BJ could have been overwhelmed with other emotions and not looked into this moment with his son on a deeper level, but instead he took the time to consider what exactly this moment meant. It's truly a moving piece.
ReplyDeleteOn the second topic, I enjoyed listening to the story instead of reading it for a change of pace. I enjoyed seeing the author's face and hearing her different intonations. I think it works well especially for a piece like this that was personal to her and filled with different emotions such as disappointment and worry but also joy and love. Seeing the author has a different affect on the viewer/reader because we can see how the story affects the author personally through facial expressions and body language and intonations. I would enjoy hearing more stories told this way.
Elise! I love your take on pitches and how well thought out you took to your approach. The question of, "What other ways can nonfiction writing be approached to make it feel like a new experience", really intrigued me! I often think about this myself. I used to just fantasize about being a stellar author, tucked away in a nook or cranny somewhere or outside in a prairie writing for the rest of my days, but as I've gotten older I've realized that there is so much that can be done with writing. I think of writing as an art really and art can be expressed in all different forms and ways. I love how Samantha Kobs took that idea and made it her own! It inspires me to use other mediums of expressing my writing and really become my own type of artist. As far as thinking of a new way to create the experience? Personally, I'm working on a project that encompasses short documentaries of women of color, followed by poetry, or short excerpts. Through these small film sessions compiled with my writing I'm able to showcase a very real and genuine biography of each individual and uplift change against injustices, awareness for issues that are not often covered/cared about by the media, going against social norms at times, and overall providing an avenue to share stories that may often be passed by but most definitely need to be shared. In this way I feel documentary work along with writing would be a really cool experience, or combining photography with words or excerpts as well.
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